I took a break from social media. Perhaps you noticed. It’s not that I haven’t been cooking, but our family suffered a terrible tragedy and posting pictures of food and pretty plates seemed a bit trivial in comparison. On the last Sunday in January my 12-year-old niece Molly fell off a bike and passed away 2 weeks later. It was a shock to all of us.
Molly and I were very close. After having 3 boys, I was overjoyed to have a little girl in my presence who enjoyed so many of the same things I did. We had sleepovers, watched French movies, and of course, baked! Molly had quite the sweet tooth. From chocolate chip cookies to the Powdered Donut Cake from Yossy Arefi’s new book “Snacking Cakes,” we were the Molly and Polly show. In the mornings, I’d find a trail of crumbs from our latest creation that she devoured while I was asleep. When we were out and about, for example hunting for the best croissants in LA (hands down Tartine), people often mistook me as her mother, since we both look alike. And when she couldn’t decide between a chocolate or plain croissant, we’d get both (sorry Kaye).
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Being Molly’s Aunt gave me the official right to spoil her without consequences.
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As Molly grew older, she was often a model in my photographs for social media. One in particular is the post of my lasagne. You’ll see her hands wrapped around the white bowl of mushrooms. I put my apron around her, and after 20 or so poses, she was annoyed and exclaimed, “Aunt Polly, you are such a perfectionist!” She’s also in an older post holding yellow watermelon, with her bright pink swimsuit and her sweet little toes. Even now, Molly is still managing to spread the word about my chocolate chip cookies (recipe found here). My sister-in-law has been journaling about this on her Twitter account @kayesteinsapir, and somehow my cookies have gone viral through Molly’s love of them.
Recently, Molly and I made these chocolate molasses cookies. They have been a favorite of mine for several decades now. As you can see from her face, they are delicious. Originally from Martha Stewart, I changed a few things to make the chocolate the star, not the spices (sorry ginger, but you are much too strong). Perfect any time of year, people literally swoon when taking a bite into these cookies.
I am sharing this story and photos of our dear Molly (with her parent’s blessing) who made such an impact on so many in just her short 12 years on earth.
I’m still grieving and asking why, wishing I could bring her back. However, some things in life cannot be fixed, they can only be carried.
Molly, I will always carry you in my heart.
Ingredients
Makes 2 dozen
- 1 1/2 C plus 1 T unbleached all-purpose flour
- 1 t ground ginger
- 1 t ground cinnamon
- 1/4 t ground cloves
- 1/4 t freshly grated nutmeg
- 1 T unsweetened cocoa
- 1 stick (1/2 C) unsalted butter, room temperature
- 1/2 C dark brown sugar, packed
- 1/2 C uncultured molasses
- 1 t baking soda
- 1 1/2 t boiling water
- 7 oz best quality semi sweet chocolate, chopped into small pieces
Instructions
- In a medium bowl, sift together flour, spices and cocoa.
- In the bowl of an electric mixer fitted with the paddle attachment, beat the butter until lightened, about 4 minutes. Add brown sugar, beat until combined. Add molasses, beat until combined.
- In a small bowl, dissolve the baking soda with the boiling water.
- Beat half the flour mixture into the butter mixture. Beat in baking soda mixture, then remaining flour mixture. Mix in chocolate pieces.
- Wrap the dough in plastic and refrigerate for at least 2 hours or overnight.
- Pre heat oven to 325 degrees. Roll the dough into 1 1/2” balls and place on parchment (or silpat) lined baking sheets.
- Bake just until set, approximately 10 minutes. Cool on sheets.
Enjoy!
*** PRINT RECIPE
Polly, I am so sorry for you and your family. A loss like this is almost unbearable. Your comment that some things in life cannot be fixed, only carried resonates with me. And sometimes carrying this in your heart while a burden and a sadness is also a connection. Sending peace and love,
Pat Starkey
Author
Dear Pat,
Thank you for this very kind note, I appreciate it so much. xo Polly
Looks absolutely divine!
Author
Let me know how you like them Eydie.
Polly, this is such a beautiful post. It is a heartfelt tribute to Molly and a testament of your love for her. You will carry that love in your heart forever. And that powdered donut cake that she loved? That sounds divine!
Hi Polly – what a heartfelt beautifully written post!! So very sad and she left you way too soon.
…Yes of course -the cookies look delicious as usual!!
Author
Dear Helen,
Such a nice comment. Thank you so much. I’ll share the powdered donut cake with you, but the cookbook that it’s from “Snacking Cakes” is excellent. xo Polly
Oh Polly! I’m so so sorry to hear this news about Molly. Your love for Molly shines through your words. You’re so right,. It can’t be fixed only carried. We lost a thirteen year old boy in our family & it hurts his mom 60 years later. We were lucky when one of my sons was in a bicycle accident at 21 but it was scary & left permanent damage. We just never know. My wish & prayer for all of you & Molly’s family is for one day memories of Molly to bring you more smiles than tears in spite of the holes in your hearts. Wrapping you all in love. Wishing you all well.
Author
Thank you Anne. I’m so sorry about your loss. And yes, every day is a bonus. xo Polly
Polly
I’m so sad to learn about your family heartbreak. When I see Molly’s face I’m brought back to the faces of her aunts when they were young. Love is stronger than death.
Author
Dear Melanie, Thank you for your very thoughtful words. She does look like her Aunts indeed. xo Polly
Beautifully said. You honor Molly by sharing her story and your special relationship. She will always be in your heart. 💕
Author
Thank you Debbie
Polly` I’m truly sorry for your loss and know no words can really begin to make you feel better . I will keep you all in my prayers and just hope you also Know how much you must have meant to Molly . What a difference you made in her life. God bless you all xo
Author
Shelley, I am so appreciative for your kind words and thoughts. Thank you.
xo, Polly
I’m so sorry that your family lost Molly. Your words are beautiful and you have such wonderful memories. I will pray for you and your family during this heartbreaking time.
Author
Thank you Coco. I appreciate your thoughts and prayers. -Polly
Polly thank you for sharing your memories with Molly. I look forward to making these cookies and more of your recipes. She & I share the same sweet tooth. 🤍
Author
Michelle,
I’m crazy about sweets too! Hope you enjoy the cookies, and be sure and eat an extra one for Molly!
xo Polly
Polly-
You touched my heart with the background of this recipe coupled with Molly’s smile-
Thankyou for sharing your heart and recipes- I look forward to sharing with the family! XO Alicia
Dear Polly,
I am so sorry to hear about Molly. My condoleances for you and Molly’s parents. This is so extremely sad. I wish you all the strenght to carry this immense loss. Thank you for sharing your memories. I will be making these lovely cookies as a tribute to beautiful Molly.
Big hugs, Saskia
Author
So nice to hear from you Saskia. Thank you for taking the time to comment.
Polly
Too sad to find the right words but I wish you strength and faith to overcome this time.
Author
I appreciate that. Thank you : )
Polly
I’m glad you have these treasured memories with sweet Molly.
Author
Thank you.
Polly
💜 “the Molly and Polly show”. She is so blessed to have a special Aunt like you!
Author
We were a good team…thanks Melanie
xo
Polly, I am deeply sorry for your loss. Molly’s love continues to light up the world…and so do your cookies. xo